Why do we find certain things sexy, and other things un-sexy? How much of our desires are governed by genes, or culture, or individual quirks? From being turned on by “normal” things like a glimpse of an attractive body to the less mainstream attractions like fetish wear and pain, there are a variety of factors […]
social conditioning
Just Because You’re Not Into It Doesn’t Mean Someone Else Can’t Be
I want to address a common misconception I see in discussions of sexual preferences, in part because it’s helping lay a foundation for a discussion of sex work I’m going to explore in some upcoming posts. People seem to have this idea that if they’re not into it, no one else can be or should […]
Sex At Dawn: Book Review
I wrote this review in 2011 when Sex at Dawn had just come out. Yes, I know some of my academic colleagues have problems with the book, and I don’t think it’s perfect… but I still maintain that it makes an important contribution to the conversation about the intersections of sex and culture. Enjoy! Sex […]
Information Is Not An Invitation
There are two fantastic blog posts out there that are reminders to readers on the internet that just because someone openly blogs about their life, doesn’t mean you know them. The first is A Friendly Reminder That You Don’t Know Me by Ella Dawson; the second is A Less Than Friendly Reminder That You Don’t […]
Sex Positivity and Sex out of Context
I’m a big believer in the sex-positive movement, but this blog post is about contexts wherein open talk of sexuality – which is one of the things the movement promotes – can be problematic. There’s a misunderstanding about sex positivity, which conflates it with the idea that one should be having as much sex as […]
Gender Is Not A Crime
As I discussed in my blog post about how better knowledge of bodies makes for better public policy, bathroom access is a public health issue that disproportionately affects women, transgender people, and other people on who are agender or non-binary. This is one reason why I’m incensed about Indiana’s Senate Bill 35, which makes ” it […]
Sexually Active ≠ Unprincipled
One of the ways American culture gets sex wrong is by linking sexual activity with assumptions of being unprincipled, unethical, and perhaps even immoral. Historically, yes, we can somewhat blame the Puritans for upholding an atmosphere of sexual vigilance, wherein any deviation from heterosexual marital intimacy was violently punished. People who had affairs, or performed […]
On “Woman” As A Category
I’m reading My New Gender Workbook by Kate Bornstein right now, and teaching a class on women’s folklore, so I’ve got women and women’s identities on the brain. I’m really interested in the ways in which we construct womanhood and femininity, and which traits get to go in those boxes vs. which are excluded. We all know […]
Genitals, Stigma, & Shame (or why camel toe needs to die in a fire)
I don’t know whether to blame lack of universal, accurate sex education in America, or the more general sex-negative and sex-phobic lens of mainstream American culture, but it seems to me that people don’t know what’s up with their genitals. Things having to do with genitals are largely seem as shameful, and hence too stigmatized […]
In Nonconcordant Arousal Lies Freedom (The Case for Sex Ed Part 8)
New to this blog post series? Check out the rest of my blog posts making a case for sex education for all. Okay, let’s say you have acquired some basic knowledge about sex (no thanks to the efforts of those trying to keep young people in the dark). You’ve probably learned that hard penis and wet vagina = […]